Depression

     "We enjoy warmth because we have been cold. We appreciate light because we have been in darkness. By the same token, we can experience joy because we have known sadness" --David Weatherford
 
     I find it bad when people get angry at life’s bad dealings. A friend of mine finds life to be a chore. I find that so hard to believe.
How can you find it so bad, when there is so much beauty? I’m not talking about the obvious stuff: views from mountaintops, sunsets and love, but the beauty of subtlety.

     When you read this, if you read this, I want you to go outside and pick up a leaf. Look at the leaf. Think of the millions of little chlorophylls absorbing light and CO2 and changing it into breathable air that feeds the earth. Something so fragile feeds so many without even knowing about it.
     Of course, you may look at it and think why am I looking at a leaf that a 16-year-old boy from Melbourne thinks is special?
     I then want you to lift up that leaf to the sunlight and look at it again. You should be able to see millions of veins inside the leaf. Not so fragile anymore, eh? It looks like the inside of us.

     I believe in the Earth/Gaia theory. The fact that the Earth has a spirit makes sense in my mind. This spirit could be God, Allah or a Budda; I don’t know. But it is there. It feeds everything which in turn feeds everything else. This spirit is a lot like us, as I'm sure we're life everything else in the universe. It probably doesn’t know why it is there, or what it is doing, but it does the best with what it has. So it has billions of things that seem to want it dead, and billions that want it preserved, so what? 
     But about those billions that don’t care? That’s what pisses me off.
 
     How can everything work so smoothly? Everything is balanced by everything else. I like that, but some people still don't see it.
    
     Speaking of which, I recently saw the 3rd instalment of the Matrix again. I love it, and I know why. I love the way life is portrayed in it. Everything needs something to balance the equation.
     This is why I know that there can never be world peace. We need evil and confrontations to balance the equation. We also need it to learn. That’s why I never pray for world peace, or to be free of bad things happening to me. I know that I need them to help me learn lessons in life.
     “Why learn lessons in life?” you ask. “What do you need them for? You die in the end, and where does that leave you?”
     To answer this, I’ll tell you what I believe. I believe that physical life is just the beginning. Like childhood. Maybe you start a new phase of life when you die? Where, how and what are questions I’ll leave up in the air.
 
     I believe that if there is an entity out there that controls the universe, that can cross all dimensions and barriers of space and time to deal with your departed spirit, it would give you what you want.
     If there is a God, when you died, I belive it would fufill your religious dreams. If you belived in heaven, you would “go” to heaven. If you belived in re-incarnation, you would “be” reincarnated.

     So far it looks like I’ll be re-incarneted, going to heaven, joining Gaia, starting a new spiritual life and becoming a saint.
    
     Lol, that just shows how confused I am, but thats what I love about life (and what some people get so depressed about)